How To Love Who You Are
Learning to love who you are feels like a lifelong process. It is so easy to compare ourselves to other women and think, “I am not good enough.” There are a lot of things I don’t like about myself… I could pick myself apart more than a hormonal teenage girl could. I see every flaw, strive for perfection and don’t always like what I see inside or out.
Sometimes, it is hard to say “It Is Well with My Soul“, so you can find a free printable reminder…
When we see another woman we think, “She has it all together, what is wrong with me?” Even though we know she doesn’t have it all together, but we struggle with who we are in comparison. Read more about my struggle with caring too much about others here.
This year, more than ever, I have learned to recognize Satan’s voice as lies… Before, I was convinced this voice was my own and that these lies were true. It still doesn’t change the fact that I hate some of these qualities of myself.
For example, I am quick to anger, passive-aggressive, judgmental, stubborn and anxious. How could I ever like these qualities about myself? Who are you? What do you hate?
Furthermore, I hate rejection. Don’t we all? So, I hide all of these things, about myself, from people. Seems like only the people we live with see our true selves.
Even though I know I will never be everyone’s cup of tea, it is still hard news for me to swallow. I love pleasing people and feeling accepted. But the truth is, even the LORD of the universe had to deal with rejection and hatred.
Rejection hurts but the reward, of sharing your story and the Good News with others, refines us to be greater. You can learn 4 easy steps to Sharing the Gospel here.
God sees it all, though. He sees my hateful heart, my happy heart and my worried heart.
How to love Yourself
How could I love myself? I don’t like who I am… How could God ever use an annoying, negative person like me…
I am a sinner in need of the Savior, Jesus Christ. God made me with a unique story, wounds and all, to share with others. He created in me a passion for sharing encouragement with others, but in doing so it is to bring glory to God, not myself.
I am still just a sinner. So I asked myself, for what purpose did God create in me an anger, anxiousness, etc.?
Examples of loving myself
In my case… God has used my quick temper to show me how desperately I need to lean on Him during the day. He is patient; He can teach me how. When my children chose to not listen, I can easily fly off the handle or pray God tells me how to react.
Don’t get me wrong, I don’t have this all down, all the time… I still have days where I fly off the handle, yell, stomp, look like a 3-year-old myself. However, when I am spending enough quiet time with God, in his Word, I don’t have this problem.
He uses my passive aggression to call me to be bold and speak the Truth… but I can only do that with His strength and love. Naturally, when I worry about someone and notice that they are off course, I lash back with a snide comment. But if I am praying about that person, taking the time to ask God how to approach them, He fills me with compassion and patience for them. Just what this passive-aggressive gal needs.
Oh, anxiety… He uses my anxiety to remind me to call on Him for peace. When I don’t remember who gives me peace, I end up busying myself with distractions. Those only keep me occupied and distracted for a while, though. Then, I’m back at square one.
If you’d ask my mother, she would say, “You can’t forget stubborn!” Once I have my mind made up there is little to no hope of convincing me otherwise. My grandpa once told her that God made me that way for a reason. He said that there would be something someday that I would use that strong will for.
He was right! God called me to write and share, but if I wasn’t stubborn I would have given up right away. It is way easier to give up than it is to push on.
god’s desire is my desire
Once I learn to align myself with His plan, my selfish desires fade away. We can become a more peaceful, joyful, beautiful person.
Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. 1 Peter 3:3-4 NIV
These are just to name a few things I don’t love about myself. But you can see He can use any of our negative qualities to remind us to draw near to Him for help, courage, power, peace… anything.
it is well with my soul Printable
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Learn to love who you are in christ
Eventually, I learned to pray for God to use who I am instead of praying for Him to change who I am.
Who did God make you? What do you despise about yourself? Find God’s purpose for that attribute.
God made you the way you are for a reason. Share your reason. Love who he made you and be confident in God’s plan for your life.
Your site, on printerest popped up, right in front of my face. I will tell you, most sites about God & Jesus really do not impress me too much. Only because, it feels like the same story line. Yours stuck out! And made me shed some tears. “I’m struggling with a lot of issues!” (I’m Looking for professional help as well.) I feel my relationship with God is not strong enough. It is my own stubbornness that weakens me. When I do feel His presence, I’m in intense prayer & many times over just basking in His love. My prayer has been to find something more real on a personal level. Praying to put more joy & spunk in my life, like I use to have. I’m much older, soon to be 62, this coming up April. Many changes are coming up soon, as I will be going on a Mission trip in June & joining a women’s group. Your prayers would be greatly appreciated. Thank you for your site.
Hey Rhonda, thank you for stopping by and sharing that! I pray that you feel closer to Christ as you pursue His purpose for your life on this side of heaven. I will be praying for you and your trip too! Have a wonderful and blessed time <3
Wow, thank you for this post. I am constantly berating myself for my “bad” qualities, praying that God will change me, but getting discouraged that I am still the same. Now I realize that God does change some things about us, but others He leaves as a reminder to call on Him to overcome one day at a time. And He is OK with our weaknesses because His strength overcomes them. I am so thankful for women like you who have Christian blogs because God teaches me through your writing just as He teaches He through His Word.
That’s great, Deborah!!! I’m so glad you were encouraged. It makes me encouraged, too! Thank you! <3