How To Love Who You Are

Learning to love who you are feels like a lifelong process. It is so easy to compare ourselves to other women and think, “I am not good enough.” There are a lot of things I don’t like about myself… I could pick myself apart more than a hormonal teenage girl could. I see every flaw, strive for perfection and don’t always like what I see inside or out.

Sometimes, it is hard to say “It Is Well with My Soul“, so you can find a free printable reminder…

Disclosure: This post contains affiliate links for your convenience. We may receive a commission if you click a link at no additional cost to you. As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases. Please check out our privacy policy for more details. 

When we see another woman we think, “She has it all together, what is wrong with me?” Even though we know she doesn’t have it all together, but we struggle with who we are in comparison. Read more about my struggle with caring too much about others here.

This year, more than ever, I have learned to recognize Satan’s voice as lies… Before, I was convinced this voice was my own and that these lies were true. It still doesn’t change the fact that I hate some of these qualities of myself.

For example, I am quick to anger, passive-aggressive, judgmental, stubborn and anxious. How could I ever like these qualities about myself? Who are you? What do you hate?

Feeling rejected

Furthermore, I hate rejection. Don’t we all? So, I hide all of these things, about myself, from people. Seems like only the people we live with see our true selves.

Even though I know I will never be everyone’s cup of tea, it is still hard news for me to swallow. I love pleasing people and feeling accepted. But the truth is, even the LORD of the universe had to deal with rejection and hatred.

Rejection hurts but the reward, of sharing your story and the Good News with others, refines us to be greater. You can learn 4 easy steps to Sharing the Gospel here.

God sees it all, though. He sees my hateful heart, my happy heart and my worried heart.

How to love Yourself

How could I love myself? I don’t like who I am… How could God ever use an annoying, negative person like me…

I am a sinner in need of the Savior, Jesus Christ. God made me with a unique story, wounds and all, to share with others. He created in me a passion for sharing encouragement with others, but in doing so it is to bring glory to God, not myself.

I am still just a sinner. So I asked myself, for what purpose did God create in me an anger, anxiousness, etc.?

Examples of loving myself

In my case… God has used my quick temper to show me how desperately I need to lean on Him during the day. He is patient; He can teach me how. When my children chose to not listen, I can easily fly off the handle or pray God tells me how to react.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t have this all down, all the time… I still have days where I fly off the handle, yell, stomp, look like a 3-year-old myself. However, when I am spending enough quiet time with God, in his Word, I don’t have this problem.

He uses my passive aggression to call me to be bold and speak the Truth… but I can only do that with His strength and love. Naturally, when I worry about someone and notice that they are off course, I lash back with a snide comment. But if I am praying about that person, taking the time to ask God how to approach them, He fills me with compassion and patience for them. Just what this passive-aggressive gal needs.

Oh, anxiety… He uses my anxiety to remind me to call on Him for peace. When I don’t remember who gives me peace, I end up busying myself with distractions. Those only keep me occupied and distracted for a while, though. Then, I’m back at square one.

If you’d ask my mother, she would say, “You can’t forget stubborn!” Once I have my mind made up there is little to no hope of convincing me otherwise. My grandpa once told her that God made me that way for a reason. He said that there would be something someday that I would use that strong will for.

He was right! God called me to write and share, but if I wasn’t stubborn I would have given up right away. It is way easier to give up than it is to push on.

god’s desire is my desire

Once I learn to align myself with His plan, my selfish desires fade away. We can become a more peaceful, joyful, beautiful person.

Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. 1 Peter 3:3-4 NIV

These are just to name a few things I don’t love about myself. But you can see He can use any of our negative qualities to remind us to draw near to Him for help, courage, power, peace… anything.

it is well with my soul Printable

Already a subscriber? Click here to download your printable now!

These are formatted to be printed in 8×10 and 5×7. Personal use only please – Enjoy!

Learn to love who you are in christ

Eventually, I learned to pray for God to use who I am instead of praying for Him to change who I am.

Who did God make you? What do you despise about yourself? Find God’s purpose for that attribute.

God made you the way you are for a reason. Share your reason. Love who he made you and be confident in God’s plan for your life.

Enjoy This? Pin it for Later!