How I Fell in Love with God {My Testimony}

My entire life I have wondered what it meant to “Fall in love with God.” I didn’t understand the idea or how to do it, until this past year. So, for anyone wondering the same thing, I wanted to share how fell in love with God!

Growing up, I was always looking for a guy or a relationship to make me feel special and loved. I have always been sensitive, so I was looking for someone who would understand me, comfort me and love me. I wanted to feel completed by someone. But instead I felt empty.

My Hero

Then, along came my husband, who rescued me from a toxic relationship and became this hero, who cared about me, and wanted more for me. He has always cared about my happiness and has done whatever he can to make me happy.

I was feeling alone, abandoned and misunderstood when we fought. So, this marriage that I thought would fill the void and emptiness didn’t complete me either. I was wanting more…

I don’t think I am alone, in this, or that this is new for anyone in a long-term, committed relationship. There are ups and downs and there is always this longing for more – more money, more in common, more happiness.

My husband is more than I deserve, honestly. He is much more patient than I am, or will probably ever be. He gives everyone the benefit of the doubt and is positive all. of. the. time. I don’t know how! On the other hand, I am quick to judge people and am usually a nervous, negative Nancy.

He will go to the ends of the earth to provide for our family, even if he has to work odd hours, miss his kids, for months on end, and work two jobs. It is an understatement to say I am blessed. I have a great husband!

This was a me problem.

God Shaped Hole

I was looking for unconditional love in all the wrong places. I was looking at relationships to fill my God shaped hole.

He has placed a desire in our hearts to want a relationship with Him.

The worst part was that I KNEW this! I knew that a ring from a guy, marriage to a guy and children with a guy wouldn’t change any of my longings.

But I didn’t know how to fill the void. I had tried going to church, praying and, at times, I would feel close to God. For the most part, though, I was left wanting an all-the-time closeness with Him and love with God.

When Things Started To Change

Three years ago, I decided I needed to start reading the Bible, at night, to be a better mom for my daughter. At the time, I was pregnant with a little boy and I knew that if I didn’t start discovering the truths in the Bible, now, I probably wouldn’t make time for it.

So, I read the Bible every night, literally. I gave birth to my son at 8:41 pm and was reading the Bible, in my hospital room, at 11:30 pm. I was committed and wasn’t going to skip a night because I wanted to get the most out of it. Finding a Bible I understood was very important, so I found a children’s Bible. You can read my post about the Best Bibles for Every Age & Understanding here.

I started learning ways to get more from the Bible so that the meaning wasn’t lost on me. In this post, I share my 4 Tips to Understanding Your Bible Better. I was definitely on the road to cultivating a deeper relationship and love with God.

The Turning Point

Then last year, I started going to a women’s Bible study at my church. They had been meeting at my church for years and I had heard about it but I hadn’t ever been to a Bible study; so, I wasn’t sure what to expect.

A friend, from my Mom’s of Preschoolers group, told me that I should go. She said there are 300 women that meet, every Wednesday morning, at your church, and it is phenomenal. Several people from my hometown were driving 35 minutes, just to come to this Bible study. I was convinced!

So, I joined an international Bible study called Bible Study Fellowship. I didn’t realize it was international, at the time; but, soon discovered that people from all over the world have access to the messages, in base groups or in online groups. They also offer free childcare and the kiddos hear the same message their moms are studying!

God Changed Me

Through this Bible study, I saw God rescuing His believers from harm and making them successful in their endeavors because He had a purpose for them. They were in love with God, listening to God and pursuing His plan, not their own.

I saw Him protect them, direct them, and promote them. I noticed that when they trusted God with their every move – they were prosperous. They were literally going to God in prayer asking “God, should I do this?” AND HE WOULD ANSWER THEM!

If they reacted out of their own instincts, the outcome was much different. They struggled and stumbled. You can find my Free Bible verse printable here, that reminds me of God’s unfailing love.

A Leap of Faith

Shortly after starting BSF, I decided to take a leap of faith. For three years, I had felt God pushing me to start a blog about Him and the struggles that everyone faces: doubt, desiring agape love, purpose, etc.

So I leapt and trusted God with His plan. I began to blog.

For me, I was afraid to trust God’s plan because I was scared God would change me into something I didn’t want to be or want me to do something I was afraid of.

I remember when I was little always worrying God would want to make me a missionary overseas somewhere. Being a total homebody, this idea totally freaked me out. Since I was nervous that this was His plan, I ignored God’s voice and did my own thing, for many years!

The reality is God made us for His purpose so the things we already love to do just become for His purposes. When we listen to God’s voice and pursue His plans, we realize that He’s already built in the desires to do what He has called us for. You can read more about finding your purpose here.

Take myself as an example: I love to be crafty and I write, in order to vent. So blogging about God, crafts and the things God has taught me, is lik a total no-brainer.

You know what the most hilarious part about it is… I did end up becoming a missionary FROM MY OWN HOME because God makes all things possible.

The Downside

What are the costs?

God gives us gifts, talents and strengths to complete His goals. The downside is that this involves putting ourselves out there. It includes being open and real with people about our struggles and victories.

This is the scariest part of it! In blogging, I am vulnerable with complete strangers, who only know me through the parts of my life I share. This is where I have to ask God for strength and courage to be bold.

I want God to use me, so I can’t keep all of the not so pretty parts to myself.

God’s Love For Me

God sent His son, Jesus, to die on a cross but, not only that, He seeks us our whole lives waiting for us to receive Him, as our LORD and Savior.

As I read the stories in the Bible, I realized how present God is in everyone’s life. How many times He gives us trials, to get us to see Him, repent and run to Him.

It is hard for any parent to see their child suffer consequences, but if you love them there is a consequence for their misbehavior. Because you know that if you don’t they will repeat the behavior and suffer even more. God is the same way, only He is the best parent.

How I Fell In Love With God

Lately, I have been really into the song “Reckless Love” by Cody Asbury. If you are unfamiliar, you can click the blue song title above. The lyrics that I absolutely think describe our God are these.

“Oh, the overwhelming, never-ending, reckless love of God
Oh, it chases me down, fights ’til I’m found, leaves the ninety-nine
I couldn’t earn it, and I don’t deserve it, still, You give Yourself away
Oh, the overwhelming, never-ending, reckless love of God. “

“There’s no shadow You won’t light up
Mountain You won’t climb up
Coming after me
There’s no wall You won’t kick down
Lie You won’t tear down
Coming after me”

It’s amazing to me that we serve a God who would fight until I’m found because I don’t deserve it. I do my own thing all the time without asking my Creator what He molded me for.

I love that He will set up stumbling blocks for me when I am headed down the wrong path so that I can repent and get right with him.

What I love MOST is that He will give Himself away. He will die on a cross to come after me. These lyrics are my most favorite because, when I was newly married and would leave the room when we would be in a fight, I wanted my husband to come after me. The God of the universe will do that for me. And THAT is how I fell in love with God!

We have all fallen short of the glory of God. So, I fail my spouse as often as he disappoints me. I am not perfect but God is and we are His bride.

How To Fall In Love with God

• Get into His Word
• Pray before making decisions
• Bible study (find mine here)
• Join a church for community
• Ask God your purpose (Learn more here)

Getting into His Word guides your path. The Holy Spirit gives us instinct for what is right and wrong when we are in His Word.

Praying before we make decisions changes our heart to serve God, not ourselves.

Bible study is great for community and furthering your knowledge and loving God. What God tells other people from the same verses I read can be completely different and so helpful. BSF is a great place to learn from new and mature Christians.

This is also a great reason to join a church. It is wonderful to have a church family to learn about Jesus with!

Asking God to reveal the purpose for your life is a game changer. If you pursue what He reveals to you, your heart will be so happy. He designed you to do this! Ask Him today! Let go of your plan, you will love His way more.

It doesn’t matter how loving your husband, friend or parents are… we still have a God shaped hole.

Fall in Love with God Challenge

I challenge you to look at who you look to for rescue. Who do you make decision with? Friends, husband or do you go to prayer? Ask God for a heart that desires His help with your decisions and see how God blesses your path!

What is your biggest spiritual hurdle today?

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